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  • Showing posts with label bible humper. Show all posts
    Showing posts with label bible humper. Show all posts

    Jehovah's Witness is here! Turn off the tv and hide behind the couch!

    Friday, October 30, 2009

    So, I remember as a kid, mom use to tell me to "never answer the door if you see someone in a suit carrying books or a bible". So I didn't, and there were many times (even though our house was in the boonies) that we would have someone matching that description, end up at our door, trying to convert us or something.


    Today at work, (key word, WORK) a dude came in and started talking to me like I was 15, asking if I'm religious or if my parents were, or if I believed in something blah blah. Let me tell you, Friday started off to be an ass-monkey of a day, and I was not ready for this little bible humper to tell me I was going to "hell". I already know, duh!

    So anyway, he hands me this magazine called "awake" for kids and teens and told me I could benefit from it, as being I am young. I then told him "Thanks, everyone says I look young for 33 (if you haven't figured out, I'm an ass...clearly stated in other posts)" and he then exclaims "MY! You are very lucky in that regard! The Jehovah would treasure your youthfulness as an asset in the halls of the holy place".

    Me being who I am, I lied and told him I was 33, I also know a little about the Jehovah’s and I asked him "So you think I'd be one of the 114,000 allowed in the Kingdom? SWEET" and he then gets even more excited as I've shown that I know something of this crap he's spewing and says "I see you are familiar with our preaching’s?". Then of course, the little devil reared its head and I said "Yeah, I'm pretty knowledgeable on the “mal-preaching” of religions and other cults, not unlike your own cult you've got yourself messed up in."

    His eyes then opened so far I thought they would fall out onto my desk, and then his head exploded. JOOST KIDDINK. it didn't, but I thought it would be cool if it did. No, he said "well I'll be on my way then" and I said "yes, yes you will, and please do not come onto our property anymore, as I will have you cited" and g'day he went.
    So, enjoy that little story. Hopefully "Joe Billy" reads this one day and realizes I'm the girl that closed the proverbial door in his face, without there even being a door to close!

    Go mom!